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Be a Great Mum: Managing family relationships

by Judy Reith

Being a mother includes living in a family, not just bringing up children. Mothers are often at the heart of families, keeping tabs on everyone’s needs, running the home, and probably fitting in a job too. It’s easy for her own needs to come last when there is so much to do every day involving the heart, mind and body. Sometimes, tension and arguments arise because mothers are worn out by carrying this burden and maybe it’s time to share the load. It partly depends on the kind of parenting style you have. Are you cold and strict, or soggy and inconsistent, or firm and fair? Children thrive best when their parents are warm, loving and firm when they need to be. Wanting to give in to our children’s demands or challenging behaviour is understandable, especially when we’re stressed, but consistency is what will help them, and us, most.

One way to do this is to create a family vision and agree a back drop for all of you to live by. Consider together (bearing in mind the ages of your children) these questions:

1 What is the purpose of our family?
2 What kind of a family do we want to be?
3 What things are really important to us?
4 What kind of feelings do we want in our home?
5 How do we want to treat one another and speak to each other?
6 What families inspire us and why?

Having a family vision provides a safety net for any of you when times are turbulent and better still, something to aspire to.
Judy Reith. www.parentingpeople.co.uk

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